ALL NEW ANSWERS COMING SOON

USELESS ADVICE FROM USELESS MEN is still trying to put together holiday furniture from Ikea. How the Swede's ever get so intricate with just one allen key, we'll never know. We should have ordered a recliner from our friends at Wholesale Furniture Brokers instead. A leather recliner would be perfect for watching the Superbowl.

We've received your questions, and we can always use some more! So keep sending, and check back after the Superbowl* for all new answers.

*Well, not IMMEDIATELY after the Superbowl. We'll still be trying to figure out if we won any money in our football pool, and how to get nacho cheese out of our football jerseys.

GO [Insert team to root for here]!!!

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ONE USELESS NEW YEARS WISH

Dear Useless Readers,

The Useless Wonder wishes all our readers a Happy New Year, which is far too optimistic because let's face it, if you're actually following our advice, you're not going to be happy. You won't even be on the same page in the dictionary as 'happy'. In fact, you won't even be in the same library. You'll be confused, puzzled and perplexed - just like us.

(And if you've got any questions about champagne, or who it's appropriate to kiss at the stroke of midnight on New Year's, get 'em in now. Maybe by the time Jan 1st 2009 rolls around we'll have found the time and/or inspiration to answer them!)

Sincerely,
The Useless Wonder

PS - The other Useless Men didn't even say boo about being included in this wish. This is from me, just me, and only me. Why? Because I care. And if it's wrong to care about wishing people a new year, even if it is three days too late, then I don't want to be right. Right?


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